Banessa!!

This reminds me of our relationship. I’m pretty sure you can guess who’s who.

Dear Stranger,

I obviously do not know you so therefore I wouldn’t have much to say.

I don’t understand the concept of writing to someone you obviously do not know and probably never will. 

Therefore that is the end of my letter. 

Yours Truly

Dreams,

I’m not exactly sure how you are supposed to write a letter to your dreams but I shall do my best.

You are constantly driving me crazy. Turning my head upside down with ideas and ambitions. And I can never seem to fully figure you out. The first one you throw at me is location. Spain. I would LOVE to live in Spain or so I think. I’ve always thought of it as a beautiful lively place and I really hope I am not let down! The second you throw is what will I do. The basic simple answer is teach and help. I have a love and a passion for helping people learn as you know and I would love to put it to great use. The biggest dream you’ve given me so far is to become in charge of a school and make a difference one bye one. The third thing you have put in my mind is with whom. This makes me chuckle. Every girl’s dream(for the most part) is to get married and have kids and a family. And it is definitely part of mine. 

I see you as things that will bring a big cheesin smile to my face. If you all came true you would make me the happiest girl alive.

The thing about you is you could change in a second. Like I said my mind is always going and you’re always giving me new ideas. And the best part about you is you are controlled by the one who gives me Life. He controls my thoughts and controls my dreams. So when I write to you in a way I’m writing to Him. I know everything he has planned for me will become my dream and I am O so excited for this journey. It’s riveting, adventurous and the suspense always keeps me on the edge of me seat. Through all my dreams He shows me the way. 

So Dreams keep bringing me wonderful ideas from Him and keep my brain spinning! I can’t wait to see what happens and which dreams of mine I get to live out!!!

Yours Truly

P.S. I really really really really want to go to Spain though. So Please don’t change that :)

Dear Parents. 

I could go on and on and on about how thankful I am for you. You really have done a lot for me especially with sending me to college. But because I know that would take me forever and I’m exhausted. Please know that I am so thankful I have such wonderful parents like you.

Throughout my whole life you have never failed me. Your goal in life was to always keep me protected. Even at times when I thought it was too intense I would look back and be so grateful my parents loved me so much as to go to the ends of the earth to help me “get better”. You have taught me the Word and have been great examples of it. 

As I move away to college and continue in my life journey I hope to become a great example as well and I hope to make you so proud!

Thanks again for being wonderful.

And dont EVER let ANYONE tell you otherwise. Not even me.

Yours Truly

Crush,

I don’t even know where to begin. In a way I have my moments when I totally wish you existed and then I realize i’m so glad you don’t. Because of your non - existence I am able to focus on more important things in life like friends, family, and college!! All journeys and parts of my life in which focus is crucial! I have no doubt you aren’t too far away but for now I am enjoying life as is, “Crushless”. 

I do however look forward to the day when you come! Who doesn’t like to be a little giddy every once in a while :). 

Until then,

Yours truly

Yes I will admit I got this idea from Miss Victoria. But I liked it so here goes.

Mary,

Where to start. I think I will just babble. 

You are honestly one of THE most amazing people I have ever met. I mean for one you have to put up with me. (people think i’m just kidding around..not so much). You have such patience and self control I admire you. You’re beautiful both inside and out. You are such an encouragement when I need it and even when I don’t. You’re so strong you don’t let anyone bring you down, or at least not for long. You know what you want and you go for it. You’re not afraid to admit when you’ve messed up. You value others and always make people feel loved.

This past year has been one heck of a freaking ride. And I’ve enjoyed it for the most part. I love our late night rides, late night swings, late night parks, late night jack in the crack, late night everything!!!!! I especially liked when we upgraded and took our relationship to the daytime ;). I can always be myself around you which is so relieving. ——sidenote. i’m listening to single ladies..we used to blast this song..but then.. well ya know…———. We’ve had our moments but in the end we both realized and made our friendship more important than anything else. And for that I am truly thankful! 

thanks for being AWESOME!! 

I love you! And will miss you terribly when I move away from you :)

Yours Truly!

The Bible: 2 Timothy Chapter 3

Mary Alice (Desperate Housewives) (via steff-uh-neegrace, kari-shma)

I should probably be sleeping but due to my o so smart large consumption of caffeine today I am prevented from doing so. So on to the next best thing (before I start looking up funny videos via youtube), writing.

I am for the most part a very impatient person. I don’t like slow drivers, I don’t like waiting longer than 5 min for my coffee, I HATE long lines anywhere, and I definitely don’t like when problems go unresolved. 

However recently my patience has been put to the test and overall I feel as though I passed. At least with a high C. Yet somehow I have this feeling that something is not resolved. I feel as though my patience is still being tested still. And I can’t stand it!!!!! I very much dislike the feeling of uncertainty. I feel as though I should be a big girl and get over whatever it is. But, You guessed it!!, I can’t!!! The feeling still lingers and the consequence of my impatience is now kicking in. 

So basically: I really want this to be resolved. I have been VERY patient. It still isn’t resolved. I am getting really impatient. Im frustrated.

Not a good way to go to bed. 

All will be better in the morning :)

I know I’m not the easiest person to get along with. I know I screw up and even piss you off. I’m not good with words and I’m not good with sentimentality. I have faults far greater than any one else I know. I am constantly at war with myself and my emotions. I try to be happy and positive all the time and time and again I fail. I have serious trust issues. I’m terrified of losing another person in my life. I am constantly haunted by my past and decisions I might have or never made. I put you down and belittle you for what purpose? I have yet to discover. I am a mystery even to myself. I never desire to hurt you. I just CAN’T express my feelings and thoughts all the time. I am an emotional wreck and until I heal I will continue to be a very complicated individual.

I feel pain for the hurt I’ve brought you. Understand I do nothing out of maliciousness but everything I do out of love. I am sorry for my faults and how they effect you. You will forever be a constant reminder of who I should and should not be. Just understand one thing for me:

I do love you. And I always will.